Better to Bless Than Impress (by Diane Gallagher)

Guest Blogger Wednesday :)

Phew… we made it!  We survived another busy weekend in the Gallagher household.  My 5^th and 6^th grade boys were playing the roles of Tweedle  Dee and Tweedle Dum in their school’s production of “Alice in Wonderland” so my in-laws were coming to town to watch the show.  To make the most of their visit, we hosted one of our combination birthday bashes. 

Since we have seven children, we have resorted to holding two family birthday parties a year – one in the Fall for our August, November and December “babies,” and one in the spring for our February, May (2) and June children.  Do not fear… we still honor the individual child on his/her actual birthday as immediate family but we hold off on the larger celebrations.  It works well (other than being a bi-annual drain on the pocketbook) because we consolidate gatherings and get more bang for our buck. 

To be honest, though, it takes a lot of motivation for me to host these events.  We have a large extended family, and we include some friends and godparents so it is rarely a small number.  We also like to provide a meal since our guests are so generous to our children.  It is the least we can do.  The problem this past week was that we had so many distractions -- I could not put the time and attention into the party and house preparation that I desire. 

We have established a tradition of allowing the kids to choose a cake design.  We have done footballs, Hello Kitty, race tracks, monster trucks, Sponge Bob, Winnie the Pooh, etc. Since I am not the most artistic person, I find a design that I can handle and do my best.  It is amazing what a butter knife and some skittles can do! J  My girls were requesting a princess crown cake while my boys wanted a repeat of the monster truck they had enjoyed years ago and were reminded of in a recent home video viewing.  As I put my schedule together for the week, I started to get panicky.  These cakes take a little time…when would I make them?  There were performances Thursday, Friday and Saturday, plus the card party I wrote about in last week’s blog.  Too much.  And what would my dinner menu consist of?  We like to offer new dishes instead of the same old standbys.  I perused the internet…nothing clicked.  More panic.  How was I going to pull this off?  I have not even mentioned the state of my house.  On top of all this, I also made two trips to the pediatrician during the week:  one child had an advanced bladder infection and one was suffering from chronic headaches.  Grocery shopping, laundry, purchasing makeup for dress rehearsal.  I like to put on a nice event, but this was a little too much for my sanity.  Both my mother-in-law, sister and mother had offered to help.  I knew I had support.  The main obstacle?  My pride. 

I want to appear like I have it all together (so far from the truth).  I like to make cakes that are admired by my children and others for being creative and fun (notice I did not say “beautiful” or “well done”).  I guess since I am a stay-at-home Mom, I find some fulfillment in being a good hostess.  Fortunately, God subtly reminded me that I needed to let go of these prideful tendencies and embrace the practical realities of our week.  I remember reading that it is better to bless than to impress.  This line has stuck with me for years.  I often forget to follow the wise advice, but am glad to be reminded of it. 

Will my children enjoy the party more because they have a princess cake?  Will the guests be better fed because the menu is original?  Will people enjoy their conversations more because my cupboards are scrubbed?  A friend once said, “as long as the bathroom is clean, no one really notices anything else.”  So goodbye monster truck cake, hello cupcakes frosted by my 5 yr. old.  My mother-in-law made her delicious macaroni and cheese while my mother provided her always reliable and yummy meatballs for subs.  The office door was closed so no one would get lost in the mounds of clutter in there but my front door was opened to the 50 family members and friends who graced our halls. 

Martha Stewart may not be calling to ask me to do an article on hosting a party, and Family Fun magazine may not want a photo shoot of my cupcakes, but I am optimistically hoping that everyone went away with full bellies and happy memories.  Yes – it IS better to bless than to impress.  I better keep that in mind in two weeks when we are hosting my 3^rd grader’s 1^st Communion bash.