Life Long Learning

  The school bell doth toll...this time for ME!  Yep, 45 years old and I'm a backpack toting, Psych 101 studying, note taking, BONAFIDE student.

    Admittedly, this is not the first time I have answered the call of the "bell."  My first college experience was while I was in the Navy, stationed in Spain.  I added English and Ethics courses to my regular duties as a "Squid" overseas.  Not a bad way to break the scholastic ice.  The next time I headed back to school was sheerly for knowledge itself.  I was on a spiritual quest and wanted to know WHY I believed WHAT I believed.  So, off to the Franciscan University of Steubenville I went, with a course load of theology, sociology, and even an acting class (SO much fun!).  I then took time off to apply some of this knowledge in a practical way.
 
   A few years passed before I heard the Diiing...Dooong...ringing a beckon to further knowledge.  I answered with, "Yes please, I'll have a course of Public Speaking with a side order of Principles of Management."  By this time I had a little one to chase around so this was a whole new ball game figuring out how to manage time.  I decided the timing wasn't right to go for my undergrad degree.  However, that was not to be my last attempt. I eventually tried going back when I was the mother of four children.  That trial period lasted one semester of four classes.  Clarity struck when one of my children was standing a mere foot away repeating, "Mommy, Mommy, Mama, Mom..." in an effort to gain my attention. I was bleary-

eyed from staying up til 3:30 A.M., hunched over my keyboard searching for the perfect ending to a history essay assignment when a flashback struck like a lightning bolt. The flashback was a vision of what kind of Mommy I had always thought I'd be and it was in stark contrast with my then current abilities as wife and mother of four kiddos aged six and under, attempting a full time course load.  Aaand...I was expecting again.  That semester was a defining moment, teaching me to "let it go."

  Here I am, 13 years later, not regretting a single moment my choice allowed me.  In fact I'm grateful I had the opportunity to be present to my family, give myself fully to my loves, and live life in the moment.  Though I am far from not being needed as "Mom" (may that never be the case!), the pealing bell summons again.  This time, it's a family affair.

My 6 year old finds neurons interesting...sort of

  My youngest of seven is in first grade and she fakes interest while I describe how the synaptic vessels deliver neurotransmitters.  My seventh grader is willing to discuss the topic of "fake news" with me since we are both currently covering this matter in our respective classrooms, and my tenth grader has volunteered to tutor me in Algebra if need be.  Trust me...if I have to take any math class, the need will definitely BE.


 My husband takes my breath away with his support.  He works hard to help me carve out the necessary time for homework yet balances me with an invite to tuck the younger kids in and say their prayers.  My teens still burst in or quietly wander through the office door and flop in my easy chair to ask questions, share their highs and lows of the day, or willingly be subjected to the latest chapter on Human Behavior.  I never took down the chin-up bar from when my eldest occupied this room so I have a pretty constant call to watch daring feats of strength while I'm memorizing definitions.

60s means heat wave in Erie

  I've learned the way for me to achieve balance is to include my family in my studies and insert my studies where my family is.  This weekend the beautiful weather whispered, well, more like shouted
our names with temperatures in the 60s.  We couldn't let that call go unanswered, so off to the park we went.  I read from the text book while my youngest played on the jungle gym and her older brothers shot hoops.  When she tired of climbing, she asked for a push on the swing.  I readily complied then jumped on the open swing next to her and pumped my legs til my feet touched the sky. We giggled like crazy as butterflies filled our bellies.

  Maybe I needed to be taught more from the school called LIFE before the "school bell" called me back.  I find myself relating what I learn in the classroom to moments I've lived through and I'm grateful for the opportunity to have a deep well of experience to draw from.  Feels like the timing's right.  We shall see.  Diiiing...Doooong.



GIFTED Art

  I'm going with an old adage I've heard that says it's NEVER too late to say thank you.
  So, here goes..."Thank you, Mr. Brian Pardini!"

  Utterly whimsical and completely captivating, your gift to me was freely offered and spontaneously found.  It embodies the spirit of fun and your playful presentation itself, highlighted the surprise and lent to the magic of receiving. 

  To those of you have no idea what I'm talking about...allow me to explain:
  A few years ago I brought a few of my children into the Lincoln Center Community Library and was unexpectedly transported to a delightfully playful world of imaginative creativity.  I was, for the first time, encountering Brian Pardini's display of incredibly cool driftwood pieces, which formed fantastic creatures, ingenious animals, and insightful people.  Resting atop the neatly ordered book shelves and nestled into nooks and crannies these creations called to me...I simply couldn't get enough.  My children and I wandered the library, lost in the allure of inventive pieces fashioned from the kind of material we had undoubtedly walked by countless times on our trips to Presque Isle and other jaunts down to the shores of Lake Erie.  Now we were seeing natures gifts with new eyes- through the lens of possibility!

  I researched Brian's work but never got up the nerve to reach out to tell him how his work inspired me with it's light-hearted creativity and use of what was naturally offered.  Over the next several months I saw pieces of the collection move to the Raymond M.Blasco, M.D. Memorial Library and even read an article in the paper about him. 

  What I did not expect...at all...was to be presented with my very own Pardini original.  In keeping with his fun, playful style and much like the first time I encountered this art- I happened upon it.  I was walking the Karl Boyes Multipurpose Trail  at Presque Isle State Park with a friend, when something out of the ordinary caught my eye.  THIS very piece was sitting on a park bench.  I

Thank you Mr. Pardini!

immediately recognized the style but had no idea why it was there...unescorted.  How could this be?  Was it stolen from the library and discarded anonymously during a sudden bout of thief's remorse?  Was it forgotten during a lunch date on that frosty bench?  Was I being pranked or tested?  Whatever the case, I was not about to let this work of art sit out in the elements, which I suppose is funny since that's where it originated.  I looked around to see if anyone might have just stepped away for a moment with the intent of coming back for it.  No one fit the bill.  In a split decision, I snatched it up and kept on down the path, talking my friend's ear off about my fascination with these creations.  It's a signed piece- this was special!  I was determined to find it's rightful home.  I even considered a book I had read titled UNthink, by Erik Wahl, a graffiti artist/motivational speaker.  In each town he visits he hides an original piece of his art and leaves clues for it to be found as in a scavenger hunt.  Could I be that lucky?


  Days passed before I worked up the nerve to bashfully approach a librarian at Lincoln library to ask if she'd heard of a piece of the Pardini collection gone missing.  She laughed and conspiratorially leaned forward to reassure me, "That's what he does.  He'll randomly leave a piece of his work near an area he collects material as a thank you.  It's for the finder to keep." 

  I was dumbstruck in a sudden tumble of appreciation, relief, and inspiration. "HOW FUN IS THAT!?!," I thought.  What a cool way to pay it forward.  My family was elated that I would not be a suspect for thievery (whew! ha ha)...and that we were, in fact, the proud owners of a Brian Pardini original!  It's rightful home was mine and I was thrilled!

Legitimately ours: A Pardini original!

  Therefore, a very heart-felt and official THANK YOU, Mr. Brian Pardini, for the inspiration to see beyond what the eye sees and for the gift of spontaneity and generosity.  Your art and your spirit are themselves, a true gift to this world.


  Brace yourself for inspiration as you check out more of Brian's work here:
Brian Pardini: Art

**Make sure to read Brian's "STATEMENT" on the left hand column of his site...Intriguing!



 

Date Night!

 

  "Hey, guess what?," my six year-old daughter hollered, "My Mom and Dad are going on a DATE!!" 

The eyebrows of the visiting neighborhood girls shot up as they responded, "Wow, that's great!," before turning to me with twinkling eyes.  "Yeah," I responded with a lackluster grin.  My husband had just asked me to join him for wings at the corner pub and I was tired but determined to see this through as I had turned down his last three "30 cent wing night" invites.  When I whispered "Daddy and I are going on a date," to my youngest it was more with the incentive of hurrying her through her nighttime routine of jammies, teeth brushing, prayers, and story time.  She took my announcement as the epitome of every princess and prince story time and...well...ran with it- straight to my closet to pick out the fanciest of fancies for me to wear on our "date."

Fancy!

  I kid you not, my pipsqueak, little blondie was starry eyed as she dove into the array of coat hangers and literally held up sequins and ruffles.  I countered with comfy hopefuls of denim capris and t-shirts.  She developed a system of giving me thumbs half-way up or even thumbs down.  At one point her thumbs down was so vehement that I asked if I should donate the colorful tank I halfheartedly held up.  She responded, "nah, you don't have to get rid of it...I might grow used to it...one day."  Aaand, into the donate bag it went.



  Disappointed but willing to accept my desire for comfort over pizazz, she ultimately gave a half-hearted, midway thumb-up and shook her head sadly as she agreed to my extremely bland "date" attire.  Eager to move on, she exclaimed, "Ok Mom, time for make-up!"  With lightning speed she located and pulled out that one tube of bright RED lipstick that must have pulled at my sentimental heart-strings enough to hide it out of sight instead of discarding it during the removal of all 17 pieces of Wal-mart's holiday deluxe make-up gift set.  By this point, even knowing I'd severely decimated every romantic notion once whispered into "happily ever after" stories, I could only stare blankly at that tiny hand waving her red, waxy magic toward my lips.

  "Ummmm...how bout we try something that matches a bit more?," I weakly offered.  She could deal with options, "Sure Mom, show me what you got!"  "Wellll...," I tried to buy time as I rummaged around and came up with two safe choices.  I bravely held out #550 SAND in one hand and with a flourish attempted to impress her with No-name option 2 which could have been named SAND with a mere hint of glimmer.  Her obvious lack of enthusiasm was immediately on display as she lowered her eyelids halfway to convey her boredom and asked, "So...they're the same?"


BOOOORING!

  This night was destined to be a teacher from the get-go...I can barely admit that I had attempted to reward my sixteen year-old son's hard work at the house by inviting him to come with us.  To say my husband lacked enthusiasm with eyelids half lowered would be a gross understatement.  He was looking forward to "date-night" as well.  Turns out all this effort was to open my tired eyes to see how deep I had dug into the trenches of Mommy-hood.  In the end, well- actually before we began, we were asked to leave the wing establishment because of our son's age.  We had no idea they had recently changed their rules to prevent anyone under 21 to be seated after 9 p.m- even at the outside patio that had drawn us on previous summer nights.

    Ironically, my six-year old daughter was my "wing-man" that night...having my back and giving me a lot to think about in terms of dating my husband. 

  All's well that ends well.  On my next invite to date-night you can bet I found a happy medium somewhere between sequins and denim...and even broke out the curling iron and brighter pallets that left SAND in the dust.  My husband and I eventually enjoyed a night out, held hands, giggled at brave karaoke participants, and reveled in that sweet feeling of 17 years and going strong.  Casual or frilly, I'm looking forward to dating my hubby for years to come!

 

Happy Birthday Brings Changes

Dearest Family and Friends,

  For those of you who may be unaware--Seven years ago today our family's lives were forever changed with the birth of our seventh child, John Michael. 

  Well, let me back up- our lives were first changed in the discovery that we were expecting another baby- there is ALWAYS that mystifying blend of excitement mixed with the reality of accepting a whole new person into the family.  However, it was in the discovery of John Michael's genetic condition, Trisomy 18, our paradigm shift of parenting soared, plummeted, and eventually found peace throughout the pregnancy, birth, tentative two days of life, and ultimately death of our beloved son and brother.

  I had started this blog, Harborlily Creative, five years ago in hopes of establishing an outlet of creativity along with a desire to inspire others to use their creative talents.  It became my place to throw thoughts, humorous findings, parenting tips, and the beauty of discovered truths.  I cast my lot into the vast world wide web to see what would be sifted and what just might stick throughout time.  Interestingly, those things I was certain would remain have drifted off and I find the common theme that has remained to be a giant mirror held up to my life..in all it's imperfections, beautiful laughter, silly phrases, and real life moments.  I'm totally cool with that.  Perhaps I'm becoming more comfortable in my own skin after all these years of thinking, "In order for it to be right it had to look a certain way, behave a certain way, sound a certain way, etc."   My life does not resemble what I had envisioned at the start of marriage and motherhood.  In many ways I still struggle with trying to meld my reality with my image of what was "supposed to be."  However, it is the Peace I find in letting go and embracing the joy right in front of me that allows me to accept my life for what it is- my vocation.

   Once upon a time I wrote a book: TRIUMPH about living through John Michael's pregnancy and facing the unknowns after being given an "adverse prenatal diagnosis."  For some reason I thought it wise to keep my social media sites separate.  I had a personal FB page in addition to the Harborlily Creative page- which was renamed to match the book, Triumph, and the new Harborlily Creative page to keep a candle lit for the original hope of encouraging others in their lives and creativity.  I have a website devoted to sharing the book as well:  http://www.triumph-story.com

  Recently during a conversation in which I was discussing my general confusion about what gets posted where, a wise, young woman asked me, "Susan, why do you feel the need to keep all these bits of your life separate?"  To which I responded that, at the time of separation I had thought the average person might find the death of our son depressing and it might be a better idea to have a different place to host those conversations about pregnancy and loss.  Again, this gentle soul carefully offered her opinion that having John Michael was and is a part of my journey.  Our experience with our son helped shape my perspectives for the better in many areas of life, love, and even in discovering God's will and purpose.

  Perhaps it's time to stop separating all these areas that I thought needed boundaries and merge my efforts while embracing the whole of who I am and what I have to offer.

  Just when I thought I was getting comfortable in my own skin I'm shown it's time for growth.  Once again, I'm totally cool with that.  I've heard it said the only constant in life is change...so here we go.  From here on I will be posting under the Harborlily Creative Facebook page and other social media sites listed as Harborlily Creative.  I would GREATLY APPRECIATE your support in liking and following these pages!  More exciting things to come as I explore and develop the ideas that have been percolating for a while now- so please do stay connected!


  In the meantime won't you please join us in celebrating John Michael's birthday by sharing your prayer intentions with him?  He was baptized before his death so we know he carries your intentions to the very throne of God.  This mother's heart is sure of his love for you and his desire to help you find Peace. 

  Happy Birthday Son!



 

 

ROOTED in Surprise

  My five year-old daughter and I were snuggled in for my "favorite time of the day."  This "favorite time" is notoriously known amongst my children as "Nap Time."

  Looking for insight and inspiration from the mind of one so young and unsullied as my little, sparkly blue-eyed cherub I asked her, "So, what's it like to be Evangeline Rose Yurkewicz?"  To which she responded without missing a beat...

  "Well, I've always wanted to be a horseradish."

  And there you have it folks...outta the mouths of babes.  Well, kiddo, I gotta admit...I did not see that one coming.